Educational Leadership & Technology

Number four of the Twelve Commandments for People Who Work with People is to exhibit a spirit of caring. I think we can all agree that caring about what people are doing and saying is important, but how many of us truly do it? The fact is that we, as teachers and administrators, get busy. We have papers to grade, tests to mark, lessons to plan, budgets to develop, curriculum to align, data to analyze; in other words, there are plenty of traps to get caught in. And that is exactly what happens, we get caught in traps. We forget the most important point of this job of education — people. The papers, tests, lessons, budgets, curriculum, and data don’t mean a damn thing if we forget that in the end it is all about people. Teachers need to remember that students come first; administrators need to remember that students come first, teachers second, and all the other junk comes after. The people need to know that the institution cares! The only way the instution shows care is through every member of the institution displaying care towards each other.

A student comes into the office for discipline, he/she has already had a conflict with another person — a student, a teacher, an administrator. The last thing that student needs is another difficult conflict; now is the time for care. The student needs to understand that even though a rule was broke, even though a conflict occurred, that the instution still cares about them. This is a time to listen and remain calm. Clearly the student needs to explain their side of the story and normally some form of discipline needs to be given, but it doesn’t need to be given with anger, malice, or spite. It needs to be given with care. The student wants to hear that they have been listen to by an adult. Sometimes they expect that adult to negotiate with them; sometimes they expect that adult to forgive them; sometimes they expect that adult to deliver bad news; but one thing they never expect is that adult to be aggressive toward them, because it simply shouldn’t happen.

Now I have violated this myself, and freely admit to making mistakes, which is exactly what students need to hear from the adult. They need this “You made a mistake, it happens. There is nothing wrong with making a mistake; it is human to make a mistake, but when we make mistakes there are consequences. And the consequence for this mistake is…” Now the student is ready to hear the bad news, the punishment, the discipline, but I think every time they are able to leave the situation knowing that they aren’t a bad person. I’m sure there are people out there who will call me a weak liberal person who is added to the downfall of American society (someone like Rush Limbaugh, for example), but the fact is (and unlike Rush, I have research to support this) this method works and produces results. Educational psychology has years of data displaying that students need positive interactions with adults, not negative ones. But all too often this is mistranslated into weak and watered-down self-esteem education that allows students to do whatever they wish, which is the mistake of soft-minded liberals. Then comes the attack from the crazy, right wing, nut jobs who believe all students who ever speak out in class should be placed in a reform school. Trust me friends, a middle path exists and it works. Students need firm, yet fair treatment, just like any other human being. Students need to know that you care.